12-13-2021 “Do you have plans for Christmas?” Nope. Not a damn thing.

***DM THOUGHTS IN BLUE***

Babe, how on Earth would we play Truth or Dare via fifth-dimensional conversation and a pendulum?

The same way we do the reverse pendulum.

That is fine for the Truth questions. What happens when one of us says, “Dare?”

We will get there. I have an idea. You start.

K. Truth or Dare?

Truth.

Bam! Okay, let me think for a few seconds…Got it.

A couple months ago, before I deleted my Facebook account, I saw you respond to the shared post, ‘Raise your hand if you have never had a DUI.’. You chimed in saying something like, “Not me.” What I would like to know is the number representing the amount of times you have driven a vehicle inebriated. Vehicle or a boat.

You do not want to know.

That bad, eh?

Yes.

I respect that honesty. I will not even further the question asking for a number.

I appreciate that.

Your turn.

Truth or Dare?

Truth.

I hear, like, three different questions right now in my head from you. Just pick one, for now, babe.

That guy. That guy you had me beat. Did you get me to the bar that night just to see me beat him real quick?

Yes. I did. He was good. He was sexy. The female instinct in me kicked in and something in me needed to know you were better than he was. And you were. You practically ran the table on him. I was so turned on.

But then after the game and you left, he looked at me and said, “Did you bring him down here just to beat me?”

I didn’t know what to say. So, I apologized. I felt like a total bitch piece of garbage. I really did.

He forgave me, though. I walked him halfway home and he suddenly grabbed my face and kissed me. But, since he is married, he is a piece of shit. In fact, after he kissed me, those were the last words I ever heard from him as he walked off. “I’m a piece of shit.”

Never saw the guy again anywhere playing pool after that night. I don’t even remember his name.

Your turn. Truth or Dare?

Truth.

Did Kieran intentionally flirt with the older lady floozie that one night at the bar just to make me jealous?

Yes.

No shit!? You, butt! That is awesome! That makes me feel so sexy. It would be different if you had no idea I was watching you flirt with some random woman. If you did it to intentionally make me jealous, that is fucking hot. It worked. You do that thing where you lean in close to say something.

Which reminds me… My turn, right?

Yup.

Truth or Dare?

Dare.

Wait, I had a question for you. You were supposed to say ‘Truth’.

You are just going to have to wait for your next turn, hun. Now, what is my dare?

Okay then. I dare you to tell me the truth when I ask you if you intended to make Kieran jealous that night with Cliff at the bar.

Way to get to your Truth question when it’s a Dare. Well played, sir.

I can’t believe you are even bringing that up.

My answer is No. And yes.

How is that a ‘Yes’ and a ‘No’ answer?

I had no interest in the guy other than he could shoot. No plans on trying to get into his pants. But, I noticed quickly your entire attitude and mood changed as soon as I started asking him to show me some things on the table. I wanted to be sure I was seeing what I was seeing, and what I was seeing was jealousy. I milked it a little, yes, after I figured out what it was. vbbb (Sorry. Ojo kitty walked across my keyboard.) Your walking pace gets twice as fast and intense. You won’t make eye contact with anyone and will hit the Ignore Christina At All Costs button in your brain.

So yeah, no, I had no intention originally of making Kieran jealous using Cliff. I just hitched a ride on what he already created in his mind and rode it with him without needing a ticket.

Babe, did Kieran grow up in a small town in Pennsylvania?

Yes.

Smaller than Socorro?

No.

But, lots smaller than Los Angeles where I grew up?

Yes.

Is Kieran a little worried I will not want to move to the other coast with him because he feels if I do not know anyone, I will be lonely and unhappy?

Yes.

Not a chance, babe. Beginning with fourth grade, I didn’t go to the same school for more than one year until I hit 11th grade at Canyon. (Go Cowboys.) We moved a lot throughout Los Angeles county. New schools were normal for me. Never have I had trouble making friends. I can make a new bestie in line at a Starbucks by simply mentioning the fact she ordered oat milk and striking up a conversation on just what the hell she must be allergic to.’

***THE CAPITOL BAR 12-14-2021 4:55PM***

What a beautiful day! We had a meeting at work today for an hour. Finally, Kelsie will stop reusing coffee pucks. Hopefully, Raquela got the jyst that she is taking too many cigarette breaks and that they are longer than ten minutes. The boss lady Erika is going to let Chef know to get Milly, who works in the cafeteria, to stop bugging the coffee shop for free lattes multiple times a day. Just because she and Chef are fucking, should not be ‘the okay’ to bug us for lattes multiple times a day.

No, I am not jealous. I just said it bugs me when she wants me to make her a large white chocolate latte with 15 pumps of white chocolate three times a day. And I can’t believe I just heard that. My hardon for Chef limped out when I saw what he is attracted to in women. Milly is 25 going on 14. He likes girls to follow him around and get his coffee. She probably sucks a mean dick, too, or else why, at 35, are you attracted to that type of woman? Either way, my attraction to him ended the moment I saw she followed him around like a puppy dog all day at work and he liked it.

The type of women a man is attracted to for more than just fucking is important. It affects the air it gives off of them as a man and the type he is.

For example…let’s say your ex was kind-hearted, only thought of others, wanted to know about you as opposed to always talking about her, and did not blame everyone else for her problems. She would be tons more attractive to you as a woman. Not just an object.

Be honest. You knew in your heart she was not the right type you truly wanted for a wife and mother of your children. I feel like you thought you might be able to change that in her.

You are right. She wasn’t and I thought she would change.

Babe, not to bring it up, but…

Then why are you bringing it up?

I dunno. Fine, I won’t.

Good.

Then you know what I was going to say?

Yes. Yes, I thought it was odd, but never said anything.

***5:34PM MTN 2 SHOTS AND A BEER AND HALF IN***

Babe! I just shot the best practice run I have ever shot!

You drank those fast. What did you start again? 4:55pm?

When have you ever nursed a shot? And did you not see what I just typed?!

I don’t need to see it. I am in your head already. These are for Kieran and posterity. The bottom line is you drank those drinks fast in a small time frame.

YOU ARE MISSING MY POINT!

I just shot the best practice game of my life! Missed twice! Scratched once.

That’s great, babe! I mean, I know. I was there.

(Ha-ha! My buddy Mark just walked into The Cap and the thought I heard was, “Look what the cat drug in.”)

Smart guy. Just needs to shower, comb his hair and pull up his pants.

He is a twin flame. He does not know it, though.

Babe, do you fart after you eat cheese?

Yes. Well, sometimes. It depends on how much I eat.

Just asking. I am having a mozzarella, basil, and tomato panini here at the bar. We’ll find out in about an hour and I start crop-dusting people.

***THE CAPITOL BAR 10:57PM MTN***

*I ever tell you this popped up in my feed the other morning? LOL!*

They just cut me off. Ciera did. She is the one who cut me off the one and only other time I was cut off. But, I have been here since 5:30pm. Babe, I played awesome pool, though.

How are you getting home?

Babe, this guy, Zach, total ringer, he was my partner the entire night. We ran the table the entire night!

How are you getting home?

Walking?

You had better not be driving. Are you working tomorrow?

No, I am not working. I am off work until January 12. My hearing for the DWI case was pushed back to January 5th. If the state is still not ready, meaning they still have not gotten the interview with Officer Chavez done or the DVD of my arrest sent to my attorney, she is going to recommend to Judge Felix that they dismiss my case.

It is the last call. One more beer.

You are cut off.

Not if I ask Traevon, the other bartender for the beer. He may not know I am cut off.

How are you getting home, Christina???

I got this.

Jesus Christ. How are you even typing this?

I do not fucking know. I can barely see the screen and keyboard in here. Even with the lights on.

Ha! Traevon got me the beer. I am ok, babe. I can totally drive the half mioe home like this.

You can’t even spell MILE right!

gtramerly will pick it up and I will edit later.

Six pack.

What?

You have had a six-pack tonight. I counted.

You weren’t even here. And shows how much you know. Altogether, I believe it was a little more than a six-pack.

CHRISTINA!!

This twenty-year-old keeps texting me.

Why are you texting him back?!

He needs some help.

Don’t you dare be his Mrs. Robinson!!!

I need to get out of the bar. They are closing soon.

Back in a bit, babe.

Christina Marie…

You don’t even kiow my last name.

and you cannot even type. You’d better not be fucking driving home.

I am not driving home.

You are.

Christ.

***I ended up chatting with friends after closing and was able to drive home after I sobered up a bit.***

Man, what a fun night.


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